Deanna Roy

Six-Time USA Today Bestselling Author

May 11, 2014

Why it’s hard to have a “happy” Mother’s Day

Deanna / Poignancy / grief, loss, Mother's Day /

I generally don’t wake up on Mother’s Day to breakfast in bed or hand-colored cards.

I have five children, but they are not with me as this day begins. Here are all the reasons why:

My first-born, Casey Shay, died five months into my pregnancy.
My second and fourth, Emily and Elizabeth, are with their dad this morning, since we are divorced.
My third and fifth died early in the pregnancies.

I am lucky that I still have my mom. I know many of you no longer do.

And there are a lot of empty nesters who will make do with a phone call.

Some moms will visit their children’s graves today.

So I’m thinking of all of you whose Mother’s Day is not, never was, or no longer is that perfectly imagined day with little ones bringing you burnt toast and jumping on your pillows.

We still have something to celebrate. The moms and grandmothers who once held us tight.

The babies we carried, if only for a little while. Or the children we loved and raised as long as could.

It’s still an important day.

And I’m holding out my hand to you with love and understanding.

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